Uh oh. The baby is crying. But “crying” doesn’t really do this sound justice. It’ s more like the piercing wail of a wounded animal. You know that cry: baby is hungry. Time to get the mashed bananas.
But wait. You need a bib, right? So you go to the linen drawer, rifle through in search of a clean one, and the thought strikes you: all these bibs are pretty lame. I mean, it’s not that they don’t get the job done. It’s not even that your kid would know the difference. It’s just that…well…you can only look at cartoon drawings of fluffy grizzly cubs prancing about on even fluffier clouds for so long before your brain just kind of breaks.
What the hell has happened to your life? You used to be so cool and carefree, and now you’re shoveling boiled yams into your kid’s mouth and watching them dribble onto Dora’s lifeless eyes for the umpteenth time. Now, don’t get me wrong: being a parent is awesome, but the cutesy wardrobe? Not particularly cutting edge.
Luckily, we’re here to save you. Meet the KegWorks Organic Cotton Baby Bibs!
Each of these bibs is made from 100% premium combed organic cotton. What does that mean? It means they’re soft enough to keep your kid happy. It means they’re absorbent enough to soak up all the slop it’s sure to see. It means they’re durable enough to stand up to repeated washings without unraveling or shrinking to an unusable size.
But that’s not what’s really important. No, what’s really important is that these bibs will make you laugh. They’ll make your friends laugh. Hell they’ll make your kid laugh in about 20 years when you’re looking at old pictures. And isn’t that better than googly eyed zoo animals?
Seriously, these bibs are hilarious and just about as high-quality as bibs get. What’s not to like? Buy one (or two…or all three) today and make Junior’s mealtime just a little bit more palatable. You deserve it.